Evidence of Life

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Do perfectionists know they’re a perfectionist?

I, in fact, did not. I know that I want my home to look pristine and almost un-lived in. My car to look like I just drove it off the lot and no evidence of dirt in sight. My makeup to look flawless, and my relationships with family and friends to be smooth sailing at all times.

After countless debris flying at my car from road trips, my car no longer looks like I drove it off the lot. When I first discovered a scratch, I was devastated y’all. I had plans of keeping my car perfect until it was time for the next one. 

After trying so hard to keep my home looking like it came straight out of a magazine, I realized that the only time it stayed that way was when nobody came over and I sat still and did nothing for the majority of the day.

After cutting people out of my life for not understanding the expectations I had of them, that I never actually communicated - because they should “just know” right? (heavy on the sarcasm) - I realized that my circle got smaller and smaller and resentment grew in the existing one.

After trying so hard to perfect my makeup routine so that my skin looks flawless and air-brushed, I realized that if I smiled too hard or squinted my eyes from laughing, it would begin to crease, and let’s not even begin talking about how your skin changes with age. 

The moral in each of those stories and what I’m discovering is that the dirt, scratches, accidental spills, difficult conversations, the lived in makeup, and the misplaced pillows and throws are all evidence of life. A life of experiences. A life of adventure. A life well-lived. So… invite the people over. Apologize and have the hard conversation. Take the trip. And laugh carelessly because the moment will only happen once.

For those of us struggling with perfection or trying desperately to keep things pristine and well together, embrace the messiness of life. It could very well be that some of those messy moments could be attached to some of the best memories. Do what you can to steward what you have well, and also don’t forget to love and enjoy what actually matters in the end.

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Proverbs 14:4 NLT

Without oxen a stable stays clean, but you need a strong ox for a large harvest.